Confession.

I am a worrier.

I need to say it again just to remind myself how dumb it is. I am a worrier.

We talked about it tonight at church, but the more I think about it, holy moly I am a chronic worrier. How ridiculous. Let's think about my life right now. Two stable incomes. A beautiful house. A really great marriage that I thoroughly enjoy. Wonderful (and I do mean wonderful) friends and family that I can't get enough of. A very, very comfortable lifestyle. What in the world do I have to worry about? If you got in my head, you wouldn't know I have it so good. You wouldn't know that I get plenty of sleep, eat three meals a day, get up to a reasonable commute and work daily with people that I really, really like. Drive my reasonable commute home to a house that I love, see my husband who is my favorite person alive, spend my evenings either relaxing with him or with friends, do a decent amount of traveling to places that are wonderful.

And yet.

I can talk myself into a panic attack at any moment. Isn't that RIDICULOUS?! I can talk myself into it. And I do. Oh but it gets better! Once I talk myself into it, I can't talk myself out of it! The mind... it's crazy. I realize my life won't always be like this. I realize this is a season. I can assure you, I've had my share of seasons. I've had my share of days where I wasn't overcome with things that are wonderful about my life. And here is the worst part of my confession: the times when something is seriously wrong are the times that I worry the least. My mind focuses on something real, and I deal with it, and somehow I block out all the worthless worrying over things that don't matter. (You should all probably step away from your computers now, lest the lightning bolt that will soon strike me somehow to get to you; I'm pretty sure saying things like 'I live best when some major crisis is taking place' is an open invitation for God to test me. I take it back. Really.) Trust me, I don't desire a crisis. I just desire not to worry. Not to have any anxiety. Ugh.

On a happier note... I get to do a little babysitting this weekend and you KNOW how I love to sit on a good baby! Ha... I know. That's a terrible joke. But I really do love babies, so I'm all over it. Maybe I'll get in a picture or two.

Love to all! Feel free to just scroll through my posts in your google readers. They have been of little use to you lately.